Soul Midwifery by Sylvia
What is Soul Midwifery?
Last year I qualified as a Soul Midwife (or death doulas as they are also known). This is something I believe I was drawn to from an early age. I was trained by the amazing Felicity Warner, Head of the Soul Midwives School, and an inspirational person in every sense of the word.
What is a Soul Midwife I hear you say? Well, we regard every dying person in our care as if they are the most important person in the world. Referred to as friend, we cherish them as if they were our family members. We offer a range of gentle therapies such as using essential oils, singing bowls, reiki, colour therapy, music and relaxation to soothe and to reassure our friend as well as keeping a vigil in the last few days. We are skilled advisors and advocates and have the time, skills and specialist knowledge of the dying process to provide non-denominational pastoral support, from the point of diagnosis until the last moment. We provide non-medical intervention and encourage our friend to have deep conversations to help them live as full a life as possible until the end.
My Journey
From an early age, I have been fascinated by aspects of death. I read the weekly obituary column in the papers, looking to see who had died, how old they were, and why. I used to wander around the local graveyard, reading the headstones and discovering that whole families had died within a few months of each other or death had taken them at an early age.
I remember my mother taking me (I was 5 at the time) with her when she went to pay her respects after the death of an elderly woman who lived in the village. She was lying in a bed in her front room and she looked as if she was sleeping. She had a beautiful nightdress on and her arms were outside the bed covers. Her face was pale, but she looked peaceful and I felt no fear being in her room, just curiosity.
As the years went on, I visited graveyards, churches and cathedrals in many parts of the UK and abroad. I love the old buildings, the sense of reverence and awe and the importance that familiar rites, including those surrounding funerals, help in the grieving process.
People and pets around me died. Some were elderly, some died of diseases like cancer, and some were very young. I sang in the local church choir so had a grandstand view of the coffin and the floral tributes during a funeral. Did you know that a coffin is always carried in feet first, so the deceased can look directly at God, apart from a vicar who is carried in head first so that he can look at the congregation? Feet first is also symbolic of life, and the transition from ‘this’ life into the ‘next’ life, depending on your beliefs. It mimics the way a person would normally travel through life - feet on the ground.
Now I don’t want you thinking that I had a morbid and unhealthy interest in death and dying. It’s just that I saw dying and death as a natural process, but one that was often surrounded in fear, grief, pain and secrecy.
I never shied away from conversations about death but understood that for some people it was a taboo subject, replete with euphemisms such as “gone to meet his maker” or “she’s no longer with us”.
I’d like to share with you my journey as a new Soul Midwife and so you’ll hear more from me on this subject in future blogs. I will also showcase those essential oils that are both aromatherapy oils and sacred oils.
Sandalwood Essential Oil
My first spotlight is on Sandalwood, the oil of sacred devotion.
Sandalwood has been used in various rituals for thousands of years and across many faiths and beliefs. It is derived from evergreen trees that grow in Asia, Australia Pacific islands and Hawaii.
It is the second most expensive type of wood in the world and has an extremely high oil content. Sandalwood is considered one of the most sacred trees and has long played a part in devotional and spiritual rituals across many religions and was mentioned in Vedic scriptures of the 5th century.
It was used by the Egyptians to embalm their dead. In modern paganism it is used for healing and purification and in Hindu rites, sandalwood paste is often used to consecrate ritual tools before ceremonies.
Sandalwood has a warm, woody aroma and is widely used in incense, perfumes, soaps, insect repellents and added to cosmetics to add fragrance. It is related to the seventh, or root chakras at the base of the spine.
It is soothing and calming, stills the mind and helps promote restful sleep. It allows individuals to hear the voice of Spirit and to prepare for the journey ahead and connect with sacred spaces.